People with a victim mentality often think the world is against them and that they don’t have any control over their lives. They feel sorry for themselves and ultimately live in an emotional state of self-pity and sadness. They blame others for their unhappiness, whether it is their parents or an ex-partner, and take little to no action to change their inner world…but deep down there is a burning desire to make the changes so they can live peacefully and happily. So how do you break free from the victim mentality?
1. Validate yourself.
Seeking attention and validation from others may feel good as they show their care and concern, but it can also be short lived as people get tired of validating someone who is not taking positive action for themselves. Be your own support system; validate yourself with positive self-statements and affirmations. Learn to really love yourself.
2. Take responsibility for your life.
Reclaim your personal power and take control of your life. Blaming others or circumstances for your own unhappiness is only hurting yourself. You cannot change what has happened, but you can change your thoughts and create a different experience for yourself. Not taking action is a safe bet because you are not going to fail, take a risk!
In order to fully take responsibility for your own emotional and mental wellbeing you need to be able to forgive those who have wronged you in the past and who you tend to blame for your unhappiness. Forgiveness is the only way to truly heal and empower yourself to maintain a healthy state of being.
Look around you and look within you to list all the things that you are grateful for. Practising gratitude everyday helps shift your thought patterns towards a more positive outlook. The attitude of gratitude will help you boost your self-esteem, your self-worth and your overall wellbeing.
5. Give yourself a break.
Changing any behaviour can be difficult; sometimes you will have bad days. That is ok, don’t be hard on yourself. Do things to nurture your soul, whether that is to curl up and read a book, have a bath, have a massage, go for a swim in the ocean or a walk in the rainforest. Do not judge, berate or pity yourself. Take it easy and then move into a more positive and empowered head space once again.