1. Stop comparing yourself to others – Everybody has their struggles and their own personal soul contract to live out. Everybody has karmic matter to serve – heartache, heartbreak, challenges and choices. Comparing yourself to others is a fast track to unhappiness, depression and self-defeating behaviours.
No matter how easy some people seem to have it, no matter how successful, powerful, wealthy or fabulous someone appears on the outside, they still experience life’s suffering. We all suffer to some degree or another; this is what makes us ALL equal.
Find the way to self-acceptance, only involve yourself in quality relationships and find a meaningful life’s purpose and go for it.
Do not buy into people’s highlight reels on social media. It is highly likely that the person you are unfavourably comparing yourself to can’t even live up to the idealised image you have created of them in your own mind.
2. Forgive those who have wronged you – This is one of life’s hardest lessons. Forgiveness is easy in principle, but much harder to put into action. It can be hard because we don’t want to let the other person ‘off the hook’, but forgiveness is not excusing the other person’s actions. It does not mean you have to tell the other person they are forgiven.
Forgiveness does not mean you have to forget about the incident and forgiveness certainly does not mean you have to continue to include that person in your life. By forgiving, you are accepting the situation and are willing to let go of the grief, the judgement, the victim mentality and, most importantly, you are allowing yourself to heal. Forgiveness is not something you do for the other person; it is something you do for you.
3. Stop thinking negatively about yourself – Our internal messages shape our self-belief system. Self-defeating behaviours stem from a belief that you’re not worthy or deserving enough. It is quite common for these beliefs to be born from an event or criticism you received during your childhood which can lead to habitual negative thinking.
It is impossible to feel confident and successful when you are constantly beating yourself up so to stop thinking negatively you need to consciously identify these thoughts and replace them with positive self-statements. Repetitive, positive internal dialogue will gradually train your brain to eliminate negative self-talk and enable your positivity to become as automatic as your long time self-defeating behaviours once were.